Things my kids say

Oh, I know

There used to be a show, Kids Say The Darnedest Things, and I loved it. I laughed harder then I do watching America’s Funniest Home Videos. Never in my wildest dreams did I think my own children would utter similar, unique gems that’d I’d recall for days on end. I find myself telling these little anecdotes to anyone. I reminiscence those moments as much as I recall the wonderful things they’ve done to make me proud.

Not everything humorous thing they say makes it into my memory as something to hold on to, but over the last week there’s been some humdingers to add to my list.

Daughter: “There’s this girl, in choir. Well, she’s mean to everyone and before the concert tonight she was crying her balls out.”

Me: “Her balls?” *giggle* *snort*

Daughter: “I meant eyeballs.”

Me: “Sure. Soooo, why was she crying her balls out?”

Yes, I’m the evil parent who will point out these verbal-typos again and again. I do this out of love. Then there was the mis-classification incident.

Scene: Family is gathered at the dining room table playing a game called Beat The Parents. Kids ask parents questions kids know the answer to and parents ask kids questions parents should know the answer to. 

Me: “What do you call people from Denmark?”

Daughter: “Democrats.”

Me and Mr. Graf: *Choking laughter*

Son: “No, that can’t be right. How about Danes?”

Daughter: “Nope. It’s citizens. Citizens are everywhere.”

Then there’s the never-ending, mispronunciation of the word quesadilla.

Scene: We pull up to the Taco Bell drive-thru. I like Taco Bell… it’s a bad habit. 

Me: “Okay Daughter, what do you want?”

Daughter: “A quat-a-ci-ta.”

Me: *raised eyebrow* What is that?

Daughter: “You know. That thing you always get me with the tortilla and the cheese and the chicken.”

Me: “A quesadilla?”

Daughter: “Yes a quat-a-ci-ta.”

Me: *forehead slap*

Nothing prepares you for the humorous parts of parenthood. Sometimes you’re so busy trying to keep them alive that things get lost in the hubbub. But these little moments, the ones where they catch you off guard with a turn of phrase or a misplaced word bring a little joy, a little smile, and a little hope that they are still a bit naive… a bit in need of you. 🙂

What about you? If you have kids, do they utter things that make you giggle. If there are no children in your life, did your parents ever tell stories about the things you used to say?


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